Keeping up with Kaydra🤷🏼‍♀️

Love and all that is so fucking hard, i just dont know where to start Sometimes i feel so happy and over the moon and other times i feel so broken inside Am sorry that everything you do i sit and watch but my heart just can take you making a “mistake” One that will be the end of us Am sorry am so freaking paranoid about everything especially when it comes to you But its only because of all the things ive been through I love you so much i dont want my heart to break I swear losing everything we’ve built here is something i just cant take Fuck it life is so fucking hard but having you with me makes things so much less dark I want to see what the future holds for me and you This is exactly where i want to be i only wish you knew I mean you’ll soon be gone...yeah and far away And i wish you could know how much that will kill me everyday Especially the thought of you being unfaithful to me..its just a thought and i swear its killing me What i feel for u is so deep it goes beyo...

What Does success in life really mean? Is it really about having houses, cars, a high paying job and a family of your own? Why is one’s success measured by these things?        The idea of success begins in our heads and it is centered around our perception of life and what we think are important to have in life. Success is often associated with cars and houses and families, not everyone will possess these things over their lifetime but does that make them unsuccessful in life? No absolutely not success is what you make it and being successful truly depends on the individual and how they take what they have and Build on it for a better outcome. I dont think success should be measured by ones possessions I think that someone can be successful just by perfecting the art of communication, interaction, and resolving problems and by having certain morals and values that enhances them as a human being. These skills are key to living a mentally and emotionally healthy...

Why do bad things happen everytime your life is going good. Everytime something good happens its like something bad has to happen too or things just wont be equal 

wow life really doesn't always work out the way you want it to I think it takes you in the direction that it wants you to go in and you really have no control over it. Destiny is Destiny and the Universe will allow it to happen.

I am sorry for all the people I've hurt, who I've been hurting and who will continue to hurt because of ME. I've never ever hurt anyone who I considered a part of me..On purpose, How could I? How could I when we share/shared a life together, When we expressed ourselves to each other in every way How could I hurt you on purpose when I LOVE/LOVED YOU? How could I Intentionally hurt you, when seeing the PAIN in your eyes cut me so deep. Life just has a funny way of creating these situations that make us look heartless. and It has a funny way of creating monsters out of us...

I have NO understanding as to why and how someone can feel NUMB...No explanation as to why...I feel NUMB. All I know is I have absolutely no feelings towards anything anymore. Its almost as if My Life stands still while the world around me is in constant motion, Its almost as if every other process in my body stops, leaving only my thought process.. Its bad enough that I cannot fathom this and even worst that I dont know how to COPE with it. I push people away..even the ones I want to be there deep down... I 'crawl into myself'...and shut down Its hard for me to respond to the most basic questions which require help from my 'Inner-self', so I resort to 'IDK' BECAUSE I truly don't, At least not when I am numb when I am NUMB I feel nothing but the need to cry, Its like my tears take all the words I want to say with them as they pour out.

Sometimes the one you love can be a very big disappointment. .. sometimes the one you love won't be there when you need him the most.. sometimes he may not understand the extent to which you value something and because of this he ruins it and through it all as women we give them another chance only to be disappointed again?....and what then?